Well....I know most of you (or I'm just fooling myself on thinking that you) guys missed my posts about the Manning brothers. So here I am again, plasting Eli Manning on your face and hoping that you will never forget him...as in ever.
Oh I remember the Superbowl XVII. The sweet victory of the New York Giants..
Anyhoozle, I found this video of David Letterman's interview with my lovey-doves, Eli Manning.
I know you're puking right now while reading this post. Some of you would rather slap my face now and tell me to "Sleep on it." Go ahead. Come here and find me.
SMILE...you're with me!
Friday, April 04, 2008
You know how on those cartoons, sometimes you always see Tom start to run after Jerry and then pause for a moment, only to see a "Devil Tom" appear on his right shoulder and an "Angel Tom" appear on his left?
The "Devil" is saying, "Hey Buddy, go chase after that mouse. He looks mighty tasty. You know you want to, go do it!"
While the "Angel" is saying, "Don’t do that, Tom! Jerry has never done anything horrible to you, and you guys should be friends, not enemies."
As fanciful as those cartoons are, that depiction has been pretty true to life when it comes to how my thought process runs when I hit a bump on the road that I have (or haven’t) seen before.
I start battling back and forth between two voices of reason in my head. There is a part of ethical logic that reaches me, and I kind of acknowledge the fact that the positive "Angel" is probably the one that I should be paying the most attention to. Yet no matter how hard I try to fully shut her up, the "Devil" on my shoulder keeps talking. Keeps reminding me of all those negative thoughts, all those negative energy, and all those horrible memories that I have in the past, or not measuring up to what I wanted, or what I thought others wanted (another terrible thing that I must admit, I have allowed myself to be influenced by in the thoughts and opinions of others).
My favorite quote from one of my all-time favorite movie (Pretty Woman) is when Julia Roberts’ character is lying in bed with Richard Gere’s and they are facing each other. He starts to compliment her, and tell her how much potential she has in herself, and how she could be so much more than just a prostitute.
Her response is, "Somehow the bad stuff is always easier to believe. Have you ever noticed that?"
Yes, I have. Throughout my life, no matter how much I know that I will come out stronger and with more determination out of any obstacle - though at the beginning, the mean stuff, the negative energy, and the negative thoughts always seem to be the easier ones to believe. Why is it so hard to truly believe that there is good in the world and that good can come to you?
I have been told by so many teachers in my life, from grade school up until now in college, that you are what you think you are. "If you think you can do it, then you can do it." I always used to just brush it off. Psh, they are dorky teachers - what do they know?
And then as I got older, I realized that mindset played a huge part in my ability to see the true scope of things. The more negative life seemed, and I allowed it to seem that way, the more negative things had happened. The moment I started to smile or shine a light on the more positive things in my life, nothing just miraculously got cured or changed - but I was able to deal with the crap in my life with less strife and less anger.
This is way easier said than done, folks. Don’t think I am sitting here claiming that I have all the answers, for I have not. And I know there is so much of life out there for me to grab with my two bare hands and grip with all my might. To really taste, touch, see, and smell every single thing that this universe has to offer me. But even still, I have my dark days, and even still, that "Devil" seems to appear on my shoulder every time.
So I decided that I shouldn’t let fear guide me. Essentially, I realized, that’s all the "Devil" represents. An inner fear that stems from a past memory, a present thought, a futuristic notion that something might become a catastrophe and then where would I be? Well, I’d still be alive. And that’s really all that counts in the end, right? Because in the end, I don’t get to take my resume printed on nice stationary into the grave - it won’t matter that I always got good grades in Algebra or whether I was my boss’ favorite. It won’t matter what I wore or didn’t wear. And it certainly won’t matter what jobs I ever held.
That’s why I started my fresh start with a single piece of paper towel. Any kind would do. Didn’t have to be Bounty or the cheap Target kind. It didn’t have to have the puffy "extra-absorbant" squares. Just one single piece of paper towel.
And then I grabbed a pen and began to write every single negative thought I could possibly think of. (Believe me, I wrote small.) Anything that was holding me back. All the obstacles that I could possibly think of in achieving my ultimate goal.
I wrote it ALL down. Every single thing that I could think of that ever passed through the deepest cavities and the neurons on my brain and tried to infest it with negativity.
There were tears. A lot of the words got blotched out. But they weren’t meant to be read clearly - it was simply the act of writing them all down and trying to rid myself of all the negativity in my life.
The final act: I walked into my bathroom, and stepped to the "Magnificent Negativity Disposal Machine" (otherwise known as the toilet) and dropped that paper towel right in there. (Now I know they say you shouldn’t throw paper towel down there or you’ll clog it, but it just so happen that I have a very, very strong flusher!)
Then I pulled the latch and watched all the negative energy flush itself down the toilet bowl.
As I walked away, that "Devil" was cussing up a storm on my shoulder while the "Angel" was standing triumphantly. So I just ’flicked’ the "Devil" away, and gave a ’pat’ to my guardian "Angel".
SMILE...you're with me!
Monday, March 24, 2008
I know I’m not alone.
I hate group projects, and I know you feel the same way. I even hate group work. In fact, today we had the shortest, easiest group work in the world, and I managed to hate half my group.
I don’t really want to talk about it. On top of which this is the internet, and you never know for sure who might be reading this post. I’ll just say that I’ve had the (dis)pleasure of working with one of these people in the past, and found it to be equally frustrating. Not to say that there is anything wrong with the actual person/people, it's just that I plan to avoid working with them at all costs. Shouldn’t be hard..i guess?
On top of that, I am extremely good at reminding myself–in front of large group of people with whom I interact on a daily basis--that I can hardly ever phrase my thoughts verballyso that they make any amount of sense, and that I can be incredibly awkward socially.
The point is that I am now in an abysmal mood. I plan to spend the rest of my day sipping tea, reading my notes (that looks more like a scratch paper on one of your math class), and pretending that I am not in an abysmal mood. Good luck trying to find me, because I’m NOT HERE.
shoutout: Before anyone tries to tell me it’s good that I didn’t and why, I would like to let you know that I have thought it through myself, and that my reasons are better than any you can give me. Yes, I know how large a commitment leading an organization, and that is exactly why I want to do it. The real reason, rather than the superficial reasons of time and responsibilities. Sorry, but if one more person tries to act like I don’t know anything about organizations because I’m just your typical seventeen-year-old girl, I think I’m going to spin their hair *still attached* and then strangle them with it. Just walk away on this issue.
SMILE...you're with me!
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Peyton Manning, Roger Federer, and Tiger Woods
I saw this picture in wordpress...
can't you say it's cute or what??? joan loves it! i love peyton...my bestfriend loves roger...tiger woods??? ermmm...never mind!
happy easter to all!
SMILE...you're with me!
Friday, March 21, 2008
The PRICE you pay for the life you CHOOSE
1.) I've been sick for full four days last week. I became aware of the wonders of ibuprofen. I rarely take medication for anything, but I came down with a fever last Saturday which kept me in bed for almost one week. It was the kind of fever that makes all of my muscles and my joints ache, and my head float. Once I gave in to it, I was pretty useless to do much more than lie in my bed and doze. Last Monday...I finally decided that things were getting ridiculous, so I walked to the pharmacy. Voilà!! I took a pill, and an hour later, my fever just disappeared in the atmosphere. Lesson learned: sleep and don't over-use your brain!
2.) Most of you might have heard about Ramiele Malubay. She is the filipina contestant in American Idol this season. I like that girl....it seems as if she's a very nice and down to earth person. Speaking of "down-to-earth", I think she really needs to wear high heels all the time. seriously. I know God created us (and I include myself here) with short legs and we needed to stay on the ground but since she kinda look awkward each time she would stand beside her co-competitors, she's better off wearing atleast 2 inches heels. Other than her height, she's great! I hope she'd win in AI. Sorry Ramiele....if you'd want to stay in the competition, wear heels! you go girl!
3.) I knew I got inner talents but never in my life that I picture myself as a dancer. Mackenzie forced me to support her. When I said 'support', I'm not talking about a 'moral support'....but this is rather a torture! Oh well dancing tango is one thing but dancing tango in front of our church community is a different story! I was manipulated nonetheless. We had our 'orientation' last wednesday...Ms. Sandy discussed the rules in tango. And one of the rules is that we should wear heels. Well....let's see where'd we go from here. imagine me doing all this?
4.) Since I was forcing myself to wear heels, I've found love on wedges. I know I promised not to spend too much money on shoes and/or clothes but this one is different. I think I'm addicted! And now, I got a good excuse on to buy new and cheap wedges. If this is the price that I have to pay on being a tango dancer wannabe, then I don't mind paying at all!
5.) I realized that stalking Nolan* is a good exercise. I mean literally. I saw him early this morning and yah....I followed him. gawd! who knew he could walk like that? he was so fast that I have to run just to keep up with him! I got tired so I just quit.
6.) My butt is getting bigger and bigger because Ive been over-using it. no....I'm not procrastinating. I just got a lot of paperworks to write/type that requires me to sit for a full 5 hours. Plus, the french fries and macademia cookies made the situation worst. Pretty soon you'll see me walking like a penguin (stomach in, butt out) so don't be surprise, okay?
SMILE...you're with me!
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
I just got blindsided by a test. I had no idea I was supposed to have a test in Stat today...I was scared...but I actually think I did okay...or so I can feign for the moment. The scary thing was that I finished first...and I was doing everything longhand, because I didn't have a calculator with me...so I either aced the test and everyone else is stupid, or I completely failed. Both outcomes are relatively equally likely. So, I'm looking forward to the results.
Other than that, I'm just starting to get my hangover from last night's Anatomy and Physiology test. I'm not happy. But I am rather thirsty...I could use some water. Like, a lot, actually.
I'm just waiting to speak with my "adviser" regarding summer classes...right now she's carrying on pointless conversation with two women in her office... I've been waiting here for an hour now. ugh! old people! Could someone please end my misery!?!
Oi, my life is so exciting!
It's rather out of control at the moment. You know how it goes.
